Alright, kids. This is IT. This is THE UPDATE. I’m actually pretty ecstatic for this.
I do have one waring, though. Everything after this update will probably be NWS. As if a dog’s head splitting in three was. This will contain, but not be limited to:
Boobs
Mealty People
More boobs
Fully rendered people catching on fire
Weiner
So, basically. Don’t read the updates at a work/school computer where your boss/instructor could see the NWS stuff, think weird things about you; fire you, burn your house/apartment down and kill your family.
Let’s roll.
Day 5: Evolution, part 3.
Aya leaves the office, when SUDDENLY…
Whatever could this be? DAMNED CLOSE TO THE REASON.
(Awesome video.)
Oh, hey. The T-Rex exhibit. I like this!
OH SHIT! THE GOOP! It can’t get to the skeleton, right?
RIGHT!?!
OH GOD OH GOD!
Surely it can’t..
OH JESUS FUCK! CHRIST! (Seriously. Watch the video at night, fullscreen in the dark. FUCK.)
ogodogodogod
I hear ya, darlin’.
Hmm.
QUIZ TI–fuck it.
Answer selected.
DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUUNNN!
DON’T THINK! SHOOT!
Maeda: …H, hi Aya… Yes, t, there was something I really needed to test… Err… May I put my arms down now?
Aya: Did you come back here… alone…?
Maeda: …Mmm… no, Daniel came with me part of the way.
Aya: Well… where is he…?
Maeda: Err… yes… he went to look for something at the hospital… he should be on his way here…
Aya: Oh…
Maeda: …There haven’t been any combustions recently, so I… er… Anyway… I asked Wayne to make this back at the station! Please use it!
Aya: What is it…?
Maeda: Yes, er… I’ll have to explain later… But I believe this will have some effect against Eve and the creatures she controls…
Aya: Thank you. I guess I’ll have to wait and see what it does…
THIS IS AS WORTHLESS AS YOUR CHARMS. (I’m sure there’s some RPG rule here.)
Maeda: I came across some findings… mmm… yes… First of all, there was blood serum with Maya’s name labeled on it in the freezer.
Aya: …My sister’s name… And…?
Maeda: Well… the research code for it was called EVE…
Aya: EVE?! Then EVE really IS…
Maeda: It appears to have been made up of liver cells. He was culturing them in the past.
Aya: What do you mean? What for…?
Maeda: …I don’t know… There isn’t any data left. But it seems Dr. Klamp has been culturing them for years.
Maeda: Recently, it appears he was conducting research on artificial sperm… For Eve, of course…
Aya: …For Eve…?
Maeda: Err… yes… he wanted to exclude the mitochondria from the sperm and create new sperm… Sperm with no parasites… Sperm with only the nucleus…
Aya: Sperm without… the mitochondria…?
Maeda: Yes. He took the sperm that he created here and moved it to the hospital… There, he would artificially inseminate those who would volunteer for the experiment.
Aya: …Then… what was that HLA list for…?
DUN DUN DUN!
Aya: What you did…! This isn’t something you can get away with, do you understand?!
Klamp: Hahahahaha… You are pathetic, Brea! Why put yourself in the human domain by reciting meaningless laws… They’re MEANINGLESS, DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!
Hahahahaha… I guess you haven’t told your little friends, yet… Your… mitochondria… has special powers, doesn’t IT… Aya…? Hahahahahaha! But sadly… you still have the form of a human being, don’t you?
Aya: You can say all you want, but I’m just here to arrest you, Professor Klamp.
SHHOT, AYA! SHOOT! FOR EVERLASTING PEACE!
Danny-boy finally pulls through. What a bad-ass.
Danny boy: Just in time… Why didn’t you SHOOT?! You could’ve been killed!
Aya: …I know… It… just didn’t seem real… it felt more like…
Seriously, girly girl. Solid Snake had the best advice.
Officer Dollis… Why didn’t YOU shoot me?
Danny boy: What?
Klamp: I know you hate me…
Danny boy: Whaddya wanna say, huh?! OF COURSE I HATE YOU! Because of YOU, Lorraine’s…!!
Klamp: …Lorraine…? Hmm… so I see that your boy managed to escape…
Danny boy: You…!!! …I should’ve killed you WAY BACK! Someday, you’re gonna pay for this!!!
Klamp: Hahahaha… We’ll see… we’ll see…
Aya: What are you planning to do, Professor?…
Can we just shoot him now?
Klamp: The mitochondria is passed on from the mother, but you see… traces from the father can also be found in minute quantities… According to Eve, her sister in Japan was unable to attain her ultimate goal because… the father’s side of the mitochondria caused a rebellion.
Klamp: For Eve to succeed this time, I created sperm without the male mitochondria DNA… The creation was a success… Eve is now pregnant with Melissa’s body…
Aya: Pregnant?!
Maeda: How can that be… possible?
Danny boy: Damn!! Aya, we gotta kill EVE!! Let’s go!
Klamp: Hahahaha… You humans are so weak… so stupid… You may have been able to barge in here and do things YOUR way until now… BUT things are going to change. I won’t let you interfere with Eve any more…
Goddamned walls of text.
Holy. Shit. Sucks to be him!
Klamp: …Why…? Why… stay here and try to save me…?
Aya: First of all, I’m a cop and it’s my job… And after all, I am human…
Klamp: Hahahaha… Like I said, humans… are… pathetic…
Serves you right, dick.
Oh yeah. Time to unlock shit.
QUI–fuck it.
Selected.
Let’s wander around, unlocking doors for a little bit. UNTIL.
Did it just..?
AW FUCK! We shoot it a couple hundred times, and then it dies. AND THEN!
This sounds a lot like an ultimate attack.
FUCKING FUCK FUCK! The thing we just killed hits us from behind and takes use down, down down. CAN YOU GUESS WHERE!?
Oh man, oh man.
OH FUCKING HELL FUCK. Being back attacked by the already killed boss was scary enough. Than THIS!?! SQUARE.
I will even admit that during this playthrough, being back attacked by the boss we had killed made me jump.
So, Aya -vs- T-Rex. This is fair. I KNOW!
Ultimate attack in this hizzouse!
Aya catches fire. Great.
THAN EXPLODES.
Now, apparently, she’s some angel.
A pissed off angel that kicks the ever-loving SHIT out of T-Rexxor. Hells yeah.
And, apparently, the T-Rex was armed.
Out we go!
What’s behind the door? FInd out next update!
Next Update: GROSS!
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