Final Fantasy V: Page 2

Alright, let’s go on with Final Fantasy V. This is going to be super easy, too, it advances jobs quick, too. This is not perfect practice for the soon to be released Final Fantasy V Advance. By the way, FFV is Japan’s 15th best game as of this year. Does that say something? Probably not.

Butte is perfect for this job. Dumb as a rock, put pointy end into soft end. Profit. Reportedly likes swords.

I made Pink the stereotypical female role in a Final Fantasy game: the weak healer.

The old dude? A monk. Besides, they’re supposed to swear off the outside world or something. Might as well make a guy who can’t remember stuff take this role.

Tell me you saw this one coming. The awesome Pirate captain made into a thief? Hell yeah, he’s a thief. End of story.
With that out of the way, let’s continue.

Word of warning: This is the first town in game, so it’ll suck. Naturally.

My kind of pirates. Except for one small thing: Beer sucks.

Hah. Alright.

Oh, look. Dancing pretties. Butte likes.

Butte may be stupid, but he knows what he likes. Heheh. *eyebrow waggle*

I’m going about getting chicks the wrong way. Dumb as a rock = three chicks at the same time.

<3 eeee
Randomly bashing on the keys does not make you better at the piano, Butte.

It’s not cool to peek on another dude while the dude’s asleep. Dude law like number 4.


I think we’re witnessing the first Final Fantasy with not only a ‘special’ main character, but two gay males! We’re in for a TREAT!

yah, it’s huge.


The three-way later on tonight.

o hay, sup dude?

We know it’s just a cover, Butte. No need to look at the dancing girls anymore.

You have to buy your magic spells.

I don’t think we can, stud. <3
Of course not.

Pink’s awfully chatty with this old dude. What sort of a Final Fantasy are we witnessing here? Two guys who may or may not be in the closet, a pirate and a God-knows-what with pink hair.


Oh no, flashback sequence in 3…

Why are they so important? We know why Butte doesn’t need to know.

I don’t even want to know.

Okay. You’re entrusting a shiny to the wrong dude.

NO! I want my own pirate crew to command and plunder the seas with!

Having thieves is so awesome.

I think she regrets the thing that happened the other night.

Sounds like some serious shit.

Not to spoil anything, because you’ve seen it happen..but; we get new powers and abilities!

The women WILL have their own planet then! We must stop this horri–OH LOOK SHINY!

Yep, Butte is ‘special’ no doubt about it.

You mean he didn’t lose the shiny?

I’m insane with anger.

Great, I can’t wait to see what we’re fighting next. Maybe a shark?


Not cool, sea-dragon, you’re our means of transportation.

Enhance your calm.

Fuck! Why does this always happen when I do one of these!?!

Butte, asking the questions on his mi–SHINY!


So alone.


Water generally does that.

Older emulators couldn’t handle this underwater section You’d wander around for minutes or hours trying to figure out where to go.

Again, this is what happens when you come into contact with water.

With this group? I don’t think you have to worry too much there.


I guess Butte and Galuf couldn’t control their lust anymore.

Get ready for the shocking discovery of the millennium, maybe even the century.

But girls can’t be pirates.


Well, once you have dic–SHINY THING!


He was really looking, wasn’t he?

Whatever you say, girl-pirate. You’re now going to be demoted to “white mage”.

Funny, she was against this to start with.


You can totally not pick this up. Using the map is optional in this game, which makes no sense. Even with girl-pirate having a ship.

Butte, stop randomly saying this that you hear adults say.

HAHAHA! Retard.

Huh? Why do they both respond to the image of Pink’s father?

Who the?

Wow, you mean having no memory is good for something?


oshit Wait. Blonde in barely nothing? Hmmm.

What an offer.

No way, blonde bitch.

Old dude bitch slaps the crew to wake them. Or to just bitch slap them, I can’t tell.

Hells yeah.
After this we fight the blonde bitch, but I didn’t take pictures.

No problem, mang.

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