So, a few years back I wrote a LOT of words about what was wrong with the internet at the time. I blamed most of it on bloggers.
That’s still true. I hate you whiney fucks. Yes, I realize how hypocritical that is, as I’m using WordPress to power my site, and lord knows this could be easily viewed as a blog entry. If you think I’m a blogger, kindly go fuck yourself. I’m an old warhorse of the internet–not the oldest internet; therefore not having the full elder god status, but long enough to remember when things were better with worse technology. I’m not one of you, and will never be.
I know this is irrational hate for bloggers, but hell. Then my hate spread to microbloggers. I don’t care what you’re doing, I don’t care how many followers your twitter–fuck you OS X for autocorrecting “twatter” into twitter–has, it really doesn’t matter. Please tell all of us how your knees are cold, or you’re going to lunch. Or fucking instagram EVERY SINGLE THING! HOLY FUCK AWESOME FILTERS GUYS! JUST LIKE EVERYONE ELSES!
Okay, I’m not going to write as many words as I did last time. This is now about the title. But, what’s wrong with the internet today stems from twitter and now it’s EVERY. FUCKING. PLACE! (I did not use caps lock.) Including REAL LIFE. I’ve witnessed it on twitter, didn’t “get it”, saw it spread to Facebook–hated it. Then I heard it on a Subway commercial, and wondered how stupid humans are.
So, what exactly is wrong, you might be thinking. Here goes.
#These #fucking #things.
HOLY SHIT. Fuck. Your. Hashtag.
Wait. I’m sorry.
Without web searching, tell me what this means: #!
Hash bang. Unix.